Some thoughts

Has blogger been acting weird for anyone else? I am having a hard time leaving comments and have to go a round about way to write a post. Kind of annoying, but hopefully it will be fixed soon {fingers crossed}!

So I am dues for another surgery on Wednesday. This time around it is not such a big surprise and so Matt's mom is coming down to help me. I am sure my neighbors are relieved =) Although they say my kids are good and it was not a problem at all, I know it is hard to have kids thrown on them at the last minute...surprise sleepovers???...not so fun.

So Jacque will be coming Tuesday night and Wednesday we will play the waiting game again. I will be fasting (doctor's orders) from midnight on and am not looking forward to that, because I have been EXTREMELY thirsty lately. Then they will call us on Wednesday and let us know when we need to come in. It will be sometime after 3pm. If it is after 5:30pm then Matt will be there with me, if not then my kids will go to a babysitter (for only a couple of hours this time!) and Jacque will accompany me to the hospital. I hope she doesn't get too bored, and I hope she knows how much we TRULY appreciate her!

I have been off and on pain meds this week. Sometimes I need them and other times I am fine without. The bleeding comes and goes, and usually is associated with whether I am in pain or not. I am anxious for all of this to be over! I am starting my new kidney stone diet....that will probably exist for the rest of my life...sucks to be me. So far I need to drink 3 quarts of water a day (I am up every two hours at night to go pee, I swear it feels like I am pregnant!), I have to cut out red meat (although I can still have it on special occasions, but very sparingly...this means we need to get used to ground turkey {gag}), and limit my salt intake. That one is hard because there is so much salt in EVERYTHING! I will just have to be more diligent though. So far that is is, but I know that in my future it will bring a lack of strawberries, oranges, green peppers, black pepper, nuts, peanut butter, and even {horror} chocolate. But after talking to my mom I am more optimistic. She told me to just focus on the things that I can eat...like pineapple, watermelon (which I love so much I will get sick off of it & it is also good for people who have kidney stones...{jumping for joy}), mangoes, and some other pretty sweet stuff! Oh and I hear I need to start cutting out cauliflower...I hate it raw, but it is good cooked, so no more tormenting Matt with that (he hates it).

Things will be fine and I am looking forward to a life without these stones.

Oh and I have another stone that they have to blast too in the other kidney. So this surgery will be a double whammy, but it's all good...this too shall pass (pun intended...hee hee).

I'm a Stoner...true story

I went to bed on Saturday and had some crazy dream about kidney stones...ugh. I woke up at 4 am and realized the pain was no dream. I took some lortab (leftover from my shoulder surgery) and placed a heating pad over my right kidney. I didn't sleep well. And the lortab didn't even touch the pain.

At 8 am Matt called our neighbor to come help give me a blessing. He ended up taking the kids home with him because i told Matt that he had to take me to the emergency room.

Normally when I pass a stone I can handle the pain. it hurts like crazy mad, but with the pain pills it eases the pain and eventually I pass them. I seriously thought i was going to die as I sat in the emergency room. The pain got so bad that I wished someone would just knock me out! Thankfully we had an amazing ER doc, Dr. Bossler and an amazing nurse, Brian. I told Brian he was my new best friend. He was the one who administered the pain meds. They first gave me morphine...I love morphine...but unfortunately the morphine does not reciprocate this love because it did NOTHING for the pain. All hope was gone and I just wanted to die. But then I got another drug and it took the bite off of the pain. And then after a little bit I got a different drug and it did the trick! The pain stopped bothering me. It was heaven.

The Jackson's ended up taking our kids to church since we were still at the hospital. So very, very grateful for them!

They did an ultrasound of my kidney and found the stone. It is 2 cm big people! That is HUGE!!!! They usually measure kidney stones in millimeters...well in millimeters mine is 20 mm. CRAZY! So they sent me home with Percocet (I'm in love with this drug...so so so so much).

I met with a urologist Monday morning and he was amazed by the size of my stone. I told him my mom had one that was slightly bigger than mine. I know, we are amazing! He told me I was a stoner & it cracked me up. So mom and I are stoners. Heehee. I also was not eating anything because I knew I was going to have to have surgery Monday and my stomach had to be empty. I couldn't even have water, although I was still able to take my pain pills with a sip of water.

After waiting for forever I went into surgery a little after 8 pm Monday night. I was dehydrated and felt like crap. My only worry before my surgery was that I hadn't shaved my legs (it had been like 2 weeks people!). Oh well, I'm sure they have seen worse!

I guess after they knocked me out they put me in a tub of water and then blasted that stone. Unfortunately my stone is very hard and I have to do this all over again in a week or so. Ugh....

And apparently my ureter (the tube that goes from your kidney to your bladder) was all mangled up. My Dr. was wondering why I wasn't in my pain because it was so bad. Which makes him wonder what my kidney looks like. Yikes! So I have to have a CT scan to see what damage has been done to my kidney.

So far I haven't passed anything and I think there should have been some small stones coming out. Makes me a little nervous, but I just need to stop worrying about things I can't do anything about. I am still bleeding, which is another concern and if it doesn't stop by tomorrow then I have to call the doctor.

Oh and Tuesday morning I also started my period. Great timing! So not only do i get to deal with massive cramping and pain from the boulder in my side, I also get to deal with the cramping and pain from my period.

But life could be worse, I could be dying and I'm not. I am just so thankful for modern medicine and for Heavenly Father for inspiration he sends down.

Keep me in your prayers please. I am hoping that this passes soon (literally).

Moments

Do you ever wish you could just freeze time?

Just stay in one moment for as long as you want?

I've had this happen so many times. I wish i could just hit pause or maybe even rewind.

Benjamin lost his two front teeth this week.

Looks & talks so stinkin cute!

I wish I could pause this moment.

Just enjoy my sweet little boy in this moment and not let him get bigger.

Thankfully he still will give me lots and lots of love. He thinks it is especially cool to show me the I love you hand sign. I think it's cool too. It is moments like that when I can just feel love emanating around us.

This boy loves his mama, and this mama loves her boy.

There are times when Isabelle loves to hear about the day she was born.

I will tell her about how dark she was and just so beautiful. I tell her how soft & warm her skin was. And then I tell her about when I gave my first kiss as a mama. It was on her forehead and I can still feel it. And as I tell her, I kiss her forehead and it still feels the same.

She then smiles shyly and hugs me. And again I will feel the love encircling us and wrapping us tightly up.

This girl loves her mama, and this mama loves her girl.

These two are some of my greatest blessings in my life. I am so grateful for their presence in my life.

I'm so grateful that Heavenly Father blessed me with these two special spirits.

He knew that I could teach them in ways no one else could. And he also knows that they will teach me so many things that no other will.

I will never forget the day I became a mama and how my world changed.

My cup overfloweth.

I don't understand why BYU hates me so much

So I am taking a math class online through BYU. I have been very hopeful & excited and feel this is the way to go to complete this class.

Well I think I have just shot myself in the foot.

I was reading over the course syllabus tonight and everything is hunky dory....then I looked at the exam section....NO CALCULATORS ALLOWED!

What the What???

Whoever heard of taking a math test without a calculator? Not even a regular Joe Shmo calculator is allowed.

I think I am going to pass out.

Prayers...{gasp}....needed...{wheeze}...desperately...{dead faint}...

Scarfiness

So I decided to make a scarf today. I know it is supposed to be Spring, but this morning it was freezing! So I felt a bit more justified in making Isabelle a scarf. Elizabeth made these and she led me to the blog where the instructions are posted. It is http://3punkmom.blogspot.com/ just in case any of you are interested. It turned out rather cute! I made it a little bit longer cause the instructions were for her 3-year-old. And I used the extra ruffle to make the cute flower pin. I am quite proud =)

And here it is without the flower and tied more cravat style.
And thanks Mom for helping me figure out the ruffling (the machine was being stupid...or was it the seamstress...I guess that is up for debate)

I love my hair

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=enpFde5rgmw&feature=player_embedded

ummmm...this is adorable & I think this is my new theme video...especially when she says Afro!

So all of you curly girls....ROCK ON!!!!

Inspiration from my Mother

"We tend to forget that happiness doesn't come as a result of getting something we don't have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have."

~Frederick Keonig

Love on a Saturday morning

Well I wish I had pictures, but hopefully someone who took some will send some to me...hint hint =)

Yesterday was Tawnya's wedding. She is Matt's little sister & we absolutely love this girl.

First of all she is hilarious and always makes me laugh.

Second of all she loves plaid...I mean how can you not love her because of that???

And there are many more reasons, but we will stop at that...

Anyway she married Jami Havens yesterday in the Jordan River Temple. It was beautiful and I was so grateful to be there. One of my favorite moments was after the sealing Matt went up to hug her and they both were crying. It was sweet. I love it when grown men cry, and especially because they love their little sister so much and are so happy and excited for her.

Even the sealer choked up quite a bit. I loved it!

Great joy was felt by all and the bride and groom looked amazing. Probably because they couldn't stop smiling and they just emanated pure happiness.

If I ever get any pictures...hint hint...I will share them with you.

Love you Tawnya & Jami!!!!

Welcome to the Reading Restaurant

On Wednesday morning I was invited to attend the Reading Restaurant in Isabelle's class. She greeted me at the door and said, "Welcome to the Reading Restaurant. My name is Isabelle. Let me show you to your seat." I then got a menu and got to choose an appetizer. It was a poem, which she read so nicely.

We also got a main course, a side dish, and dessert.


I, of course, got one of each and then all three desserts. I couldn't resist!

At one point I told her she could sit down at the table with me, but she gave me a look and said, "Mom, waitresses don't sit down."

She then brought me a cookie and a glass of apple juice. She was an amazing waitress and a superb reader!

It was such a fun activity! I hope they do it again next year when Ben is in 1st grade =)

Hogle Zoo Field Trip

This year I got to go on the Kindergarten field trip to the zoo!!! It was so much fun to hang out with Ben! Here we are on the bus!

Ben's only a "smidgen" excited =)

Grant, Ben, and Cayden with the giraffe that kept licking the wall

I thought this sign was pretty funny cause you know it must have happened to someone!

Grant, Ben and the cheetah (this was Ben's favorite animal)

The zoo is getting ready for a dinosaur exhibit and we thought this T-Rex was pretty dang cool.

These Tortoises were HUGE!

Ben wanted one for a pet =)

How do you size up?

Kassidy, Doris, Emma, Ben, Grant & Cayden

A cool waterfall

Do you?

I do!!!!!

This gorilla totally cracked me up! He was just lounging by the glass.

Here he is scratching his armpit. No shame. He scratched his butt earlier but we missed that...darn it! He would stare straight at us, it was so cool. I love that his legs are crossed!

There were lots of random roosters and chickens walking all over the place.

This peacock was totally showing off for the peahen. She is off to the right in the pine trees. She was totally ignoring him. Poor little guy!

Here he is in all his glory and she couldn't be bothered. He even starting shaking his little behind. Too funny!

There were dead rats lying all over the place in the Bald eagles cage. So gross, but the boys thought it was cool.

This drinking fountain was broken, but I made Ben stick his head in it anyway, it was funny =)

Well, that was our trip to the zoo. We had a blast!!! I got to hang out with Ben's teacher too, totally love her. It was a great day and I was so glad that I got to hang out with my little man =)

Cupcake Connoisseur

My friend Teresa really likes to bake cupcakes. I think they just REALLY like to bake. SO on Sunday they had friends come over and taste test a million gazillion cupcakes. We didn't go because by the time I got the memo it was supposed to be over. But she called and had Matt go over and get me a plate of cupcakes. And no, I didn't eat them all by myself...I had some friends help me with that. Here are just some of the flavors that they had... S'mores, Strawberry Lemonade, Peanut Butter and Jelly, Black Forest, Maple & Bacon, Butterbeer, and the one in the middle is Rocky Road.
The S'mores was by far the best presentation. How cute is that pretzel roasting stick with the roasted marshmallow??? SO cute!

This one truly tasted like a peanut butter and jelly sandwich!

Rocky Road needed a bit more rocks in it...I am definitely a nut fan!

Yeah I totally ate the cherry on top before I took the picture =) This one was the best tasting one. But I really like cherry pie filling and chocolate cake...soooo....really there was no competition.

The ones that weren't pictured:

Butterbeer: tasted more like caramel. I think butterbeer should be more butterscotchy...

Strawberry Lemonade: pretty good. I like tart and would have loved to have a bit more tart in the frosting...

Maple & Bacon: Sounds weird, but it wasn't bad. Wasn't great either. Just so-so for me. Of course I do like my bacon smothered in syrup, but just not in cupcake form I think...

Overall: kinda fun. Has anyone else made fun cupcakes??? I am intrigued by this whole thing.

Easter 2011

Here are a few pictures of our Easter. I was sick and ended up not going to church, but we still had a good day. We just had dinner at home and enjoyed being with our small family. We got some crazy colored rolls and the store had potatoes wrapped in colored foil. It made things a bit festive =) and the kids loved it. Hope you all had a great Easter too